Have you ever been in a conversation with someone who spoke with big words or a bunch of detail that you ended up not knowing what they were taking about? Were they using words that most people don’t know or have not even ever heard? Or did they explain things with such over-the-top details that you just got lost and were not able to follow along?
Have you ever been in a conversation with someone who spoke with too simple of words and terms? Or maybe misused the words so they ended up saying something different than what they were intending? Or possibly you have been in a conversation where the person didn’t add enough detail and left it up to you to fill in the blanks and know what they meant?
These conversations have happened to all of us. On the receiving end, but maybe sometimes on the giving end too. Conversations like these are very frustrating. No matter which way it played out, we are left with inadequate information to understand the message. We end up being confused and frustrated, misunderstanding or we simply give up.
In our quest to Pursue Great!, In All You Do, we want to find the balance between these two extremes. We want to learn how to use common, everyday words that most people will understand and boil down the complexity to the basic and simplest details that will get our message across.
But, we want to use “big” enough words to adequately describe our message and make it clear. Being too simple and leaving it up to our listener to fill in the gaps or figure out our meaning will almost always lead to their not understanding what we are saying.
Remember, the message may be clear in our mind. The skill to be learned is how to simply yet thoroughly share our thoughts with others.
A good starting point in developing this skill is think about how you would speak with an eighth grader. They would be about 13-15 years of age. At this point, most young people know most of the general, everyday vocabulary that is used. They are mature enough to be able to understand most concepts. Yet, they are generally not quite equipped for complex ideas presented to them in a rapid manner.
When we speak to an eighth grader, we would speak simply and with clear detail. This will be a generally safe format, even with adults, as it will not be so simple that you are “speaking down to them”, and not so complex that they will get lost.
For a good demonstration of this skill, watch or listen to the daily newscasts. Don’t focus on the subject they are discussing, but focus on how they are delivering the message. What words are they using? How much detail is included?
We all get frustrated when our message isn’t understood and also when we can’t understand the message being delivered to us. This skill is an extremely valuable one to master in becoming a great communicator.