I have found in myself, and noticed in others, a desire to deflect attention or spit out a weak excuse when it comes to light that I have not done things correctly. It started in childhood since at that point in life I made a lot of mistakes. When we are young we are very ego-centric, focusing almost exclusively on our personal wants and needs.
Since a great life cannot be lived in an ego-centric manner, these mistakes I made were pointed out to me by my parents, teachers and other leaders in my life. So I got a lot of practice deflecting the attention off myself and on to other people or blaming the situation. I got a lot of practice thinking quickly to come up with an excuse to make it sound like I was trying to do something good or that it wasn’t my fault.
Hopefully, with age and maturity, I have learned this is not a good plan of action. Not only was I trying to make others look bad in order to make myself look good, but I wasn’t being honest with myself. I have learned if I am not honest with myself, my growth and improvement is severely stunted. And, if I am trying to make myself look good by casting the blame onto other people; my parents, teachers, leaders, friends and associates can see right through my smoke cloud.
A very long time ago there was a man and his wife living in a garden. It was a beautiful place. In fact it was perfect. The man was told by God they could eat of any tree in the garden but one specific tree. One day the devil came to the woman and talked with her. He persuaded her to eat from the fruit of the forbidden tree. She ate and gave some to her husband and he ate as well. When God confronted them for disobeying Him they blamed others. The man blamed the wife. The wife blamed the devil. Neither the man nor the woman took accountability for their actions.
We have the same tendency. This destroys trust. How can my parents, teachers, leaders, friends and associates trust anything I say or do when they can clearly see I will not take accountability for my behavior?
None of us like to be caught doing the wrong thing. The simplest way to live is to do right. To do what we are supposed to do. The reality is though, this may be the simplest way to live, it is certainly not easy. It is hard. Because we still have the ego-centric bias inside us.
Those who pursue great live for the greater good. Push yourself to live right, confess when you screw up, and commit to learn from the mistake and not repeat it!