As I become more aware of my own communication weaknesses and observe those with whom I am interacting, I see one habit keeps rearing it’s ugly head.
A pastime I have always enjoyed is people-watching. This is a very entertaining activity.
Sometimes it is downright humorous. Other times can be a blessing to see the compassion and courtesy some people have for others.
It can also be a real eye-opener to see some folks behavior and the way they treat others.
Regardless of what I observe, it is always an education I can use to grow personally and to Pursue Great!
There are lessons of what to do and lessons of what not to do.
In my people watching, I notice the same one habit rearing it’s ugly head with those I observe.
This ugly habit is being inattentive. The habit of not being mentally present when someone is talking to you.
Many things distract us. One of the biggest things is the pocket computers we all carry. The next time you are in a crowd or in a restaurant, for example, take time to put yours away and observe how many people are looking down at their phones and ignoring the people they are with.
We also can be distracted by other thoughts of our own. Worrying about work tomorrow, the chores we have to get done, our sick relative, the bill that is due, etc. The list is endless.
Sometimes, unfortunately, we are just being too lazy to put the effort into being attentive. We just kind-a half listen, and give an uh-ha from time to time.
Great communication involves great listening. Great listening involves being attentive. Much attention has been given to this by many teachers and motivators, calling this “Being present.”
The world we live in is incredibly fast paced. We are surrounded by a whirlwind of activity, information, responsibilities, pressures and all sorts of distractions.
It is very easy and very common to be “somewhere else” instead of “being present” here and now.
As you face the challenge to Pursue Great! in communicating, work on being present in the moment. Work on being intentional in blocking out the distractions and focusing on the person or people you are with.
Force yourself to say “no” when the chore list starts creeping in. Say “no” when something the person to whom you are listening has said something that triggered a tangent thought and you have the urge to Google it.
Focus on the words they are saying. Engage with them with questions to go deeper into the subject. Key in on their non-verbal signals and their emotions. Really pay attention to them. Block out distractions.
Begin by observing your own current behavior and people-watch others. You will be surprised at what you learn about your own behavior and that of the general population.
With what you learn, key in on habits you have that distract you from being present in the moment and really listening to others. You can then begin to eliminate them from your life.
Pursue Great! In all you do.